Well ...

[forestofglory]

It's been several weeks since I wrote about living in slow moving climate apocalypse and things have not really let up. Well, we have had days that aren't too hot and smoking to go outside. So that is technically an improvement.

This last week has been especially unpleasant though. This weekend there was record breaking heatwave in the Bay Area. Our house is built on a hill with the living space on the top floor. Heat rises so it gets pretty hot up there. As mentioned we don't have AC, but generally we can open the windows. But this last weekend it was too smoky. It was miserable. We all lay around in puddles on the bottom two floors.

Then it cooled off, and we had one ok day.

But yesterday was scary. At 7am I noticed that it hadn't gotten light in the morning, and it continued like that all day. The Sky was scary red color, and it never got lighter than twilight. My mom remarked that it was worse than the Hills Fire. Apparently we where experiencing "fire thunderstorms". The air quality at ground level was actually not that bad, but there was so much smoke above us that it blocked out the sun.

Today things are lighter, like still dark, but a very cloudy day instead of sunset all day. However the smoke has started dropping lower, and the air quality is way worse. I'm not sure that's better. I'm really struggling mentally -- everything is just so stressful and scary.

Comments

[darkemeralds]

It's awful, isn't it? Not only that sense of a climate apocalypse (how can anyone still be in denial?); not only the on-the-ground, daily reality of smoke and fire and storm; but the relentlessness of the onslaught. One political revelation after another that I no longer hope will make any difference, the loss of all sense of fact and truth, the endless pandemic.

It's very hard to keep away from "end times" thoughts. I find that even my fallback little pleasures--favorite books, fandom, fanfic, and even actual junk food--don't entice me these days. I don't know what it will take to lift my mind out of this terrible deep gully.

[forestofglory]

It's just so much.

[naye]

*hugs*

[forestofglory]

*hugs back*

[lunabee34]

That sounds so disorienting and strange.

*hugs*

I hope the fires abate soon.

[forestofglory]

Thank you!

[isis]

Hugs to you. We had a similar situation two years ago, and I know it sucks. We bought a window AC unit and an air purifier and closed off most of the house so we could cool the bedroom and not feel terrible.

[riventhorn]

It's been so awful. Yesterday wasn't quite as bad here as it was in the Bay Area, but it still felt like 7 pm all day. I'm feeling kind of congested from the smoke too. It's so hard to cope without some sunshine and clearer air. And the fact that this is the future, that it could get worse, is just....

[forestofglory]

I'm sorry you have to deal with this too .. the feeling that the future is just going to get worse is one of the hardest things to live with

[cgbookcat1]

It's pouring rain here in New Jersey. I wish I could send some over to the west coast.

[jesse_the_k]

Sending you warm thoughts and strength.

[forestofglory]

Thank you!

[stultiloquentia]

♥

[umadoshi]

*hugs quietly*

[forestofglory]

Thank you!

[dragoness_e]

Well, it could be worse. Back in 1980 when Mount St. Helen blew up, there were towns where it was dark at midday and drifted with ash, and yes, you were best off wearing a mask, because volcanic dust is very not good for the lungs.

It's not fun right now, but afterwards, you'll be able to look back and say "I survived that, I can handle whatever's next." I will say that as someone who was under Katrina's eye, when you survive raging disasters like that, your tolerance for other people's trivial bullshit falls through the floor. (Katrina was how the city's citizens finally got the gumption to throw half the crooks out of office, and change some of the bad laws; after political incompetence made Katrina's losses so much worse, there was no tolerance for the usual political bullshit)

[starshipfox]

I've been reading about this, and thinking so much of my friends who are affected. The year began with the absolutely devastating fires in Australia, and now California is under onslaught too. I don't even have words for how distressing it is -- I'm so sorry you're facing the brunt of it.

[trascendenza]

The endless-twilight day honestly unnerved me so much, I can't even explain exactly why, but it felt so incredibly ominous to look outside and feel like the sun was gone. All my friends and I were talking about how we felt like we were in the middle of a post-apocalyptic movie :(

[forestofglory]

Yeah, that end of the world feeling is really hard to shake.

[0dense]

oh god, fire thunderstorms - just what we need! this week has been so scary, man :( I can't believe we're getting this fire season on top of covid, like my uni called us all this morning that campus was closed for bad air quality but no one's there anyway because we're all isolating in the first place! what a farce of a year.

I just can't wait to see the sky and be free with my friends again one day. when it's green in tilden again, you know? dreaming of it.

[forestofglory]

Oh gosh, yes dreaming of picnics with friends in Tilden.

[askygoneonfire]

It sounds really scary - claustrophobic to lose the light and the air like that. Hard to imagine how it feels to live with it.