Contrasts

Yesterday the magnolia in our backyard burst in to bloom. When I looked at it in the morning there where only buds, but by afternoon there where flowers, dark pink at the base fading to white by the edge of the petals. It's been lovely, warm and sunny the past few weeks. I've been enjoying the feel of sunshine on my skin.

Meanwhile most of the rest of the country had a severe winter storm. Watching so many people without power in the freezing cold was awful. It reminded me of when our power was cut off in fire season, though of course we had much nicer weather for that. It's finding out how fragile our infrastructure really is. I hate living in slow climate apocalypse, yet I feel helpless to stop it.

Here and now the sunny is shinning and the flowers are blooming. I've made some changes and I'm doing better, with fewer hard days and more focus. There's just this dissonance of knowing I'm ok when so many others are not, and the feeling of powerlessness that goes with that.